It might be time to change the "usual or fixed way" you do things and try something different. It might be time to change your routine. The way you did things before kids might not work once you have kids. The way you did something last year might not work this year.
Rather than pursue a "fight-free" marriage, perhaps seek a relationship with healthy conflict resolution. While I do not savor conflict, the truth is that often conflict can lead to a healthier and stronger marriage. Through confronting our issues, we grow deeper in understanding, love, and affection for each other.
The drifting that occurs when we are not in perpetual union with Christ (Hebrews 2) has ripple effects like wandering from our role as wife, helper, encourager, and teammate. Drifting is sneaky and brutally subtle. In the same way we search our hearts for idols so we do not transgress the first and second commandments, we must also survey our attitudes towards our callings in the home, starting with our covenant relationship.
As a newlywed, I was a bit obsessed with keeping my husband happy. To the point that I often denied my own feelings. Husband: “Are you okay?’ Me: “I’m fine.” Husband: “Anything wrong?” Me: “Nope, all is good.” Meanwhile, inside, I would be struggling with anger or hurt. My motto which I adopted when I was young was, “Don’t rock the boat.” I assumed if I didn’t disagree or confront anyone, everyone would stay happy.
When you learn to let go and allow your newlywed children to establish their own family unit under the Lord’s authority, you are showing respect for the God-ordained sanctity of marriage. This in turn allows the couple to grow closer together as one. Avoid the temptation to interfere, manipulate, or dictate their decision-making process.
You can voice your displeasure with this activity respectfully and lovingly. If you yell at or shame him, it will probably increase the divide between you. Share facts about the destructive nature of this activity. Let him know how it's impacting your marriage.
Prayer is a life-changing, uninterrupted connection to our heavenly Father and oh how he loves to hear his children pray! Check out these 10 prayers to pray over your husband using God’s Word.
If you feel your marriage is falling apart, I hope to offer you some ideas for getting back on track. The following ideas are too simplistic for marriages involving abuse. They are intended for those who are growing apart and need help to find their way back to one another.
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